Pum Pum Finger
by Murphy Diablo
Summary: Quite possibly the most extreme Yaoi fic on this site. Kai has the time of his life one night. This the most retched piece of filth ever concieved YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED


Well hello… I fancied having a bit of saucy fun with Beyblade fan fiction and thought to myself it's finally time for me to do my part for the vast, vast, VAST "Yaoi" community here on fan fiction dot net.

What a load of gay shit!

Kai was a prostitute. Not just any prostitute, mind you. He was a top class man ho and therefore didn't come cheap. It cost a grand for a wank, two grand for a rim job (regardless of whether your asshole was flecked with shit), two and a half grand for a golden shower, three grand for a blow job (deepthroat not guaranteed), and if a client wanted to shove his dick up his ass or vice versa the price wasn't set in stone but was guaranteed to be extortionate.

MD: I feel at this point my common local dialect isn't doing much justice to the sophisticated, romantic Japanese male on male love culture but please continue to enjoy.

So, Kai was walking… no cruising down the street at night wearing leather laced jeans with a removable Velcro crotch, this matched his leather jacket under which he wore no shirt. Suddenly a posh car screeched up alongside him and the window quickly lowered "I hear they call you the Phoenix" came a frail voice from within the vehicle. Kai smiled ever such a wry little smile "Maybe they do and maybe they don't, what's it worth to ya old man?"

"Well, what say you if I were to sign this here god damn cheque but leave the amount blank for you to fill in what you think is fair" a hand reached out to hand Kai the cheque at which point Kai noted the name…. Mr Dickinson.

"I'd say…I'm all yours for the next two hours baby"

"Git yer scorching white hot ass in this car" demanded Mr Dickinson, Kai slid into the passenger seat. "You got anything to hot this party up?" asked Kai, "Well why don't just go on and see whuts in my glove compartment" winked Mr Dickinson. Kai hit the button at that point many cellophane packets of cocaine flew out all over Kai's lap "that hot enough fur you?" … "you supply the snow, I'll supply the blow, lets get this fuggun party started". They both snorted coke off the steering wheel, dashboard and each others cocks and then Mr Dickinson revved the engine and they flew on angel's wings back to his place. They burst through the door high as kites and Mr Dickinson ripped off his PVC jump suit revealing his blotchy, fat, sweaty body and an iron studded vulcanised leather thong that went RIGHT up his crack! "Oh baby, oh baby, oh baby" exclaimed Kai before ripping the bloody thing off with his teeth revealing Mr Dickinson's saggy, grey haired greazy balls and puckered cock. The two passionately kissed and made their way upstairs where Mr Dickinson produced a horse riding crop and forced it into Kai's hands "Now beat me you filthy little boy, beat me and don't hold back" Kai complied; the riding crop sliced through the sweaty air mercilessly licking the obese flesh of Mr Dickinson's body which sent tidal waves of cottage cheese like flab, rippling across his saggy buttocks and love handles. "Oh, oh, oh DAMN IT BOY I SAID DON'T HOLD BACK" screamed Mr Dickinson. Kai roared with intense effort and unleashed a hurricane of severe blows, he relentlessly increased the speed and power of the whip until his arms burned with lactic acid and Mr Dickinson's old aging body was brutally bloodied and lacerated with the searing red, interlaced lines of bruised flesh. Kai bent over at the waist, and drew in large exuasted breaths. "Now, would you care to suck my dick?"

"Why yes, it's beautiful" replied Kai, Mr Dickinson smiled like a fucking pervert and flipped out his colossal elephant log, as the sixteen inch penis unravelled down to his knees, the room was instantly filled with the spicey smell of fishy dick and asshole, Kai savoured the vile bodily odours as they fought each other for air supremacy.

"WANK MY WOOD BOY!" screamed Mr Dickinson as he swung his shlong at Kai; hitting him in the side of his head with a dull thud.

"Baby, I'm gonna roast your ass!" growled Kai tackling Mr Dickinson to the ground, the loving couple rolled the entire length of the living room, passionately kissing and tounging each other.

"Bedtime?..." asked Mr Dickinson mischievously.

"Why yes, absolutely!" grinned Kai as he licked Mr Dickinsons face.

"Well okey-fuckin-dokey then!" whispered Mr Dickinson as he scooped Kai up from the floor. Mr Dickinson made his way up the stairs with Kai. Dick swaying. He approached the bedroom door and kicked it open in a fit of lust.

"Calm down baby, we got allllllllllllllllll night!" said Kai. Mr Dickinson snarled and threw Kai on the bed. Kai sat up and faced Mr Dickinson with delight as he observed the old man's mole covered cock slowly raise and stiffen with excitement.

"….WOOOOOOOOoooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOW WHAT A FUKUN KNOB STICK!!!" Exclaimed Kai.

"Prepare to be violated you cheap, gay-ass little twink!" slobbered Mr Dickinson as he pulled back on his foreskin, revealing the mushroomoid shape of his tallywhacker, which was shinning brightly in the moonlight that shone through the window, as if heaven sent.

"BONK MY BRAINS OUT YOU HORNEY FUCKING SEX MOSTER!!!" Roared Kai as he gambolled backwards and raised his legs behind his head in a yoga type position which revealed his balls and butt hole to the now ravenous Mr Dickinson.

"YOU RAUNCHY LITTLE LOVE HANDLE, AV SOMMA THIS!!!!" Boomed Mr Dickinson as he leapt fourteen feet in the air and dive-bombed on to the bed with crushing force. Broken wood and buckled springs flew everywhere as Kai and Mr Dickinson viscously buggered each other all night long, their bellies were slapping so loud, several dogs began to bark up the street.

Mr Dickinson suddenly stopped, and withdrew his glistening sword from Kai. He looked very serious.

"…….I wish for us to perform an act!" he said firmly.

"Why yes, anything you want sweet heart." Gasped Kai; covered in old man stink. Mr Dickinson smiled and bent over the broken bed, presenting his huge cellulite filled ass.

"I want…………………………….PUM PUM FINGER!!!!" he yelled lustfully. Kai's heart lit up and glimmered like a new born star at the wonderful news, finally, pum pum finger, he always wanted to try the technique, he mentioned it to his friends on occasion but everyone of them brushed it off as gay filth _It's their problem if they were too narrow minded and bigoted to see how beautiful and natural it was _Thought Kai, but this was a night of freedom, love, and beauty and no close minded 'norm' was going to tell him different.

"Prepare yourself my love" squealed Kai as his finger negotiated it's way through the forrest of shit encrusted rectal pubic hair. "Are you ready my love whispered Kai tenderly as he located Mr Dickinson's love portal.

"BOY HOWDY, YOU BET YER SWEET HOT ASS" his lover whispered back

"HEEEEEEEEEEEERE WE FAKKING GO!" squealed Kai as his finger brutally shot up Mr Dickinson's anus, he slowly withdrew his finger and inserted it again in a rhythmic motion resembling that of an oil pump.

"TWO FINGERS BOY! I NEED TWO!" howled Mr Dickinson.

"Does three sound fucking better!" panted Kai.

"FOUR!!!" the old man demanded

"BEHAVE YOURSELF YOU FUCKING BITCH!!!!" snarled Kai as he rammed his entire fist up the chocolate love canal.

"MORE….I NEED MORE MEAT!" wailed the old man. Kai smirked evilly and inserted his leg, right up to the thigh!

"Is that all you got hot shot?!" said Mr Dickinson playfully.

"My my, you are a naughty boy, well lets see if this is enough for you" said Kai as he walked to the other end of the bedroom. He opened the chest of drawers and removed a large pot of Vaseline and smothered his skull in it. It suddenly and beautifully, became apparent what

Kai was going to do.

"The time has come…" said Kai as he observed a star falling to earth out of the window. The gods were with him, it was time…. A few moments passed, then suddenly, Kai exploded into a highspeed sprint, and like a human torpedo he slid up Mr Dickinson's ass at the speed of light until only his toes could be seen wriggling out of Mr Dickinson's sweet sweet swett hot asshole. Mr Dickinson roared with delight. The pleasure was so great that the earth shook and the heavens parted, and the loving couple ascended to heaven in a blinding beam of light which shone in the evil eyes of the ignorant masses the world over.

Fin


End file.
